Ms. Sepp's Counselor Corner: Helpful Tips & Useful Links

Below are numerous topics that may be of concern as your child goes through the elementary years. You will find strategies and articles about each of the topics. As always, please feel free to contact Ms. Sepp if you have any questions or concerns regarding your child!

Information about a variety of topics that may come up at the elementary level
Fun Way to Start a Family Chat at Dinner

ADHD/Focusing
Parenting the Child with ADHD
ADHD Parenting Tips
4 Ways to Help your Child Focus
There are many ways parents can help a child exhibiting symptoms of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder such as

Providing consistency by following predictable routines for getting ready for school, homework, play, bedtime, etc.
Model and practice appropriate organizational skills and help your child maintain their organizational systems
Help your child use large monthly calendars for planning after-school activities and when tests and assignments occur
Use timers as a visual reminder for your child when they need to complete a task
Give specific, concise directions to your child in positive ways (phrase directions as what do you want to happen rather than what you don't want to happen)
Help practice problem solving skills with your child
Give your child a chance to practice using appropriate social skills
Help your child make healthy food choices
Use encouragement and positive reinforcement

Anger Management
All About Anger for Kids
Learning to manage anger is an important life skill that needs to be taught to and practiced by all students. Discussing and modeling appropriate ways you as parents handle anger is a great way to help kids managing their own anger. There are many ways you can practice managing anger with your child, including

Take a break (moving away from what makes you angry)
Do a physical activity (shoot hoops, do jumping jacks, or run the track)
Take deep breaths
Count to 10
Squish Play-Doh
Color your feelings
Write your feelings in a journal entry, story, or poem
Read a quiet book to yourself (When Sophie Gets Angry is a good one!)
Positive self-talk (I can control my anger...)

Anxiety
Tips for Parents and Caregivers of Anxious Children
It is normal for every person to have some amount of anxiety from time to time, but when anxiety begins affecting your child's school and home functioning, there are many things you can do to help your child in addition to possibly consulting a mental health professional.

Listen to your child's worries and fears and remind them that they are not alone and that other kids have worries too
Help children address their concerns and if they are not realistic, help them see the truth
Help your child gradually ease into new situations that may cause anxiety and provide encouragement when they are in these situations
Practice relaxing including deep breathing, counting to 10, visualizations (taking a pretend field trip to the relaxing beach or a peaceful meadow), and listening to calming music
Encourage structured play dates or extracurricular activities if your child has an anxious temperament
Promote your child's independence and build on their strengths

Bullying Prevention
Information and Videos on Bullying Topics
We work hard to prevent bullying at our school but we also want our students to be prepared and know what to do if bullying occurs. At our school we teach Stop, Walk, and Talk, a strategy where students learn how to handle bullying behaviors.

STOP: First, students are taught and role play how to appropriately and assertively request another person to stop bothersome or hurtful behavior.
WALK: If this does not work, we train on how students can remove themselves from the situation.
TALK: If this does not work, the last step is to talk to an adult. We take this very seriously and want all of our children to feel listened to and safe at school.

The curriculum can be found at www.pbis.org. Parents can help by reinforcing Stop, Walk, and Talk by discussing the strategy and practicing it at home as well as listening to your child's concerns about possibly bullying behaviors and sharing your concerns with your child's teachers.

College and Career

Information about preparing children for college

Information about saving for your child's college fund

Career interest inventory for kids

Even though your child is still in elementary school, it's never too early to start talking about college and career! There are many ways parents can help children create a college-going culture!

Talk about your education and career
Discuss a variety of other careers so your child knows there are many options out there
Talk about your child's college and career goals
Introduce your child to colleges and after high-school training programs by visiting websites together
Encourage your child to do the best they can now in order to prepare for the future and develop his or her strengths

Conflict Resolution
Article about conflict resolution
Conflicts are a part of our lives every single day and because of this, we want our students to develop conflict resolution skills to help in these situations. There are many choices your child can make when in conflict in order to gain a win-win solution. You can help your child role play and decide when to use the following choices when in conflict:

Talk it out (use an inside voice)
Say "Please stop"
Walk away and stay away
Ignore...don't react
Cool off (count to 10, take deep breaths)
Say "I'm sorry"
Share or take turns
Use an I-message (I feel ____ when ____ and I need ____.)
Have a Peer Mediation

Developing Self-Esteem
Ways to Help Develop Your Child's Self-Esteem
Every parent wants a happy, healthy child with a strong sense of self-esteem and self-confidence. Here are some ways parents can support and grow their child's self-esteem:

Choose your words carefully and make sure to provide encouragement for your child
Model positive self-esteem and positive self-talk
Create a positive home environment where students feel safe and loved
Allow your child to become involved in cooperative activities such as volunteering for the good of others in order to feel good about themselves
Help your child give others compliments and make others feel good in order to trigger positive feelings amongst themselves

Divorce/Separation
Resource for Children and Families Going Through Divorce/Separation

Because lots of things will be changing in your child's life, try to keep things as consistent as possible for your child; routines = stability = safety
Listen to your child's feelings and make sure they know it's okay to share their feelings
Refrain from speaking negatively about the other parent in front of your child
Allow kids to only have to worry about "kid worries"
When kids ask questions, tell the truth in age appropriate ways
Make sure your child is not the "middle man"
Remind your child that he or she is very loved and never has to choose one parent over the other

Grief and Loss

Resource for parents for helping children cope with grief and loss
Losing a loved one can be extremely hard for individuals of any age. Below are a few ways you as parents can support your children through this difficult time

Understand that children cope with death differently and may have a range of reactions (including emotional shock, regression, acting out and explosive emotions, and questioning) depending on their developmental level
Answer your child's questions and help them understand what happened with truthful, developmentally appropriate responses
Allow children to grieve and tell their story, listen and validate their feelings, and show extra love and care
Understand that grief is a process and allow it to happen as the child needs
Realize that as children move into new developmental stages, they begin to understand the loss in a new way and may need extra support
Be aware of your own need to grieve as a parent; adults who get help working through their grief are much more able to help their child through the grieving process

Homework Hints
Homework Tips for Families
To help ensure your child finds success with homework, there are many things you can do to help! In addition to modeling getting your own work done in a timely fashion and modeling organization, you can help children in many other ways such as

Allow your child to re-energize themselves after school by taking a break, having a snack, or playing a game before beginning homework
Create a routine for homework each night using the same time and place each day
Encourage children to use planners to stay organized with assignments
Have a set place for homework like a big desk with all necessary materials available such as pencils, paper, books, and calculators; make sure the area is free of distractions
Sometimes a break may help with concentration during homework time

Internet Safety/Cyber-bullying

Information on internet safety and cyber-bullying

There are many ways you can help keep your child safe when using the internet, including

Discuss internet safety with your child
Monitor your child's internet activity by making sure they use a computer that is in a common area such as a family room rather than a child's bedroom
Remind your child to never share personal information (name, address, phone number, school, etc.) with anyone on the internet and never to agree to meet anyone on the internet
Do not allow your child to enter private chat rooms

Making Friends
Article about Helping Your Child Make Friends
Every parent wants their child to have friends, and if this is an area your child needs help with, there are many things you can do to help, including

Give your child many chances for socialization, including joining an after school club or an extra-curricular activity
Schedule play dates with friends from the neighborhood or friends from school
Role play meeting a new child with your child, greeting each other in a friendly way and making conversation
Practice partaking in conversation with your child and other social skills
Model for your child how to be a good friend and make a friend

School Transitions
Sending Your Child Off to School for the First Time
Supporting Your Child During the Transition to Middle School
Ideas to Support Your Child in School Transitions
Transitions into elementary school or middle school can cause worries for children. There are many ways a parent can help during these transitional times by

Listening and validating your child's feelings about the change
Let your children know you care about them with extra hugs/nice notes and support
Visit your child's school together
Help your child feel prepared in every way s/he can (school supplies, school clothes, healthy breakfast, etc.)
Explain the rules/procedures of school and how things will work and role play going to school and what things may be like
Allow your child to possibly sign-up for an extra-curricular activity in order to make friends and feel like s/he belongs

Stress Management
Coping Skills for Kids Site
Stress and Students
Just like adults, difficult, anxiety provoking situations can add stress to a child's life. There are many ways you can help your child cope with stressful situations, including

Practice visualizations (take a pretend field trip to the relaxing beach or a peaceful meadow)
Listen to calming music
Get lots of rest
Eat healthy foods
Drink plenty of water
Use positive self-talk (I can...)
Think positive thoughts
Focus on something good that happened that day